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With dear friends & Jess‘ family at her memorial service a few weeks ago.  It isn’t often I get to be in the same room as these wonderful people, I miss everybody already.

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(this image was made by my super talented and colorful friend, Amelia, it belongs to her.)

I don’t need to clarify it here, but I am horrified by the election results.  I was always with her.  Those results were followed by many sleepless nights and tears (no one was more crestfallen than foos), but also with a lot of productive and supportive conversations and visits with friends.  In a weird way, my life and personal routines have not been the same since.  I’ve been mentally preparing myself to intervene should I happen to observe any racist/islamophobic/sexist shenanigans (I haven’t yet).  I have also been avoiding podcasts, newspapers, and blogs I previously enjoyed.  Just hearing his voice and seeing snippets of headlines is enough to make my stomach drop.  I know this is irrational; I also know I will get past this, because pretending things aren’t what they are is never going to bring about change.

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A little over a month ago we became engaged.  It was a wonderful surprise, which involved some trickery and a little lying, sneakily captured on camera. I am very lucky to have found someone who can put up with my mild melancholia, hate of mayonnaise and highways, and my need to sleep with a fan on.  Seriously though, I already felt we were married in my heart, the getting down on one knee and presenting me with a beautiful bauble was the (please excuse the oft-used phrase) icing on the cake. Cheers!

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