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thisweekend

One of my closest friends was diagnosed with a brain tumor a few years ago, and yesterday, after many months of unsuccessful chemo, she decided she no longer wishes to receive treatment.  So today hasn’t been the best day, and I don’t think this weekend will be any better.  I will be listening to a ton of mountain goats and trying to wrap my head around how weird life is.   I started reading this Chomsky book, which is also depressing as hell, and I’m not sure will make anything better. I need to finish reading it because I also borrowed its companion book and I wish to read both before JPL wants them back.  Additionally, I started reading Harriet the Spy with Foos, and I really wish someone had reminded me that Harriet is a judgmental asshole who thinks everyone is fat before I started reading it to my four year old.  I didn’t think a photo existed for “crying sporadically,” which is why the wasting my time spot is empty.  But that’s what I will be doing.  Love your friends, and keep ’em close, because life can get weird.

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FOOOOOS

FIVE-3

FOOOOS

FIVE

I asked Seth to take some photos of Foos, I needed them for her birthday invitation, I said. He took these in like two minutes, and I am in love. I remember when she was a newborn wondering what she would really look like when she was no longer a baby blob, what her voice would sound like, what her teeth would look like.  I have been staring at these photos for a long time, there she is, a person.  She doesn’t need me as much; she closes the door when she wants privacy; she reads and writes on her own. She doesn’t even let me paint her nails –  she can do it on her own, thank you very much.

She is a dreamboat feminist, book loving, queen of words. She makes throw-up sounds whenever she sees a Donald Trump sign and wears a Ruth Bader Ginsburg pin on her jean jacket like a badge of bad-assery.  I’ve caught her belting out Sleater-Kinney in the car and Nina Simone in her “garden.” The other day, I overheard her ask her dad if he would watch “The Farts Awaken” with her (The Force Awakens), and I could not stop laughing. She wants to pet every cat, kiss every dog, rescue every stranded worm. She is a fantastic little person, and sometimes I can’t believe I get to be her mother.  Her 5th birthday signals a lot of changes; she will be in school most of the day in the fall, and after five years as a stay at home, no social life/money having mom, I have to get a job.  I am super nervous for both of us (my resume is so sad), but I am so grateful I spent that time with her.

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freelensin

freewowzen

Foos & Me // Freelensed

We had a great weekend! Sleepovers, good weather, the springs!  Happy our home is one the kids & their friends like to spend time in, and grateful I get to spend my days with these people. These are things I need to better at remembering.

Photos: Seth